Yep, It's Bendy

The boys got off the bus yesterday and Grant could barely contain himself with urgent news for me from school. He threw his backpack down, pulled out his notebook and reached into the zipper pocket to pull out an "important" booklet. My eyes nearly rolled out of my head when he handed it to me........Fundraising. Uuuugghhh. I despise... deplore...feel the utmost of hatred for fundraisers. I hate it double time this year because now I have to work for TWO kids. They both quickly let me know that I HAD to fill out the booklets with seven names and addresses to which a magazine order slip could be mailed to. That's a total of fourteen names, you see. If both kids took back their booklets the next day they would receive the most awesome, most needed, coolest thing ever:

This stupid 6 foot bendy pencil.

Or as I would rather refer to it: Child's Death Wish ( child strangles while playing with stupid, free,  entirely too long, bendy pencil), or New Gadget to Put Your Brother's Eye Out With (the boy was fine until brother wildly spun in circles with bendy pencil and whacked him in the retina).
Grant actually wanted to use it to do his homework tonight but I spent 3 minutes trying to sharpen the dumb thing to no avail. Grant was offended that I used the statement "useless piece of junk" in the same sentence with his 6 foot bendy pencil. I explained to him that that was three minutes of my life that I wish I could have back. He didn't get it.
The bendy pencil is also great for getting tangled on your feet causing you to fall. Seriously, if you are tripping on your pencil, you probably need to get a different pencil.

My  sincere condolences to those of you that are getting the fundraiser in the mail. Some of you are getting two...... because really, who can think of 14 different people? And tonight while the children sleep, I'll hide the pencils. Then tomorrow I'll toss them directly into the garbage truck when it comes by. Then after that, I'll conveniently forget what happened to them.